Friday Evening: It's 8:30pm. In 15 minutes, it will be dark outdoors. When did that happen? Oh, I know it's gradually coming when we hit June 21. I know that the days slowly start to become shorter. But just last night I got up to shut the blinds because it was fully dark outside. Not even a hint of light in the sky. I turned to look at the clock and it was barely 8:46. I told John, "It's happened." And I didn't need to say what had happened. He looked out the window at the gathering dark and sighed deeply. "Yes..."
We'd just come in from the front porch. It was nice out this evening. Fewer gnats. No mosquitoes. Just the sound of the cicadas and a gentle coolness in the air. No smell of parched grass. Everything stayed green and lovely thanks to lots of quick little showers. The cherry laurels, which I loathe, have held on to their leaves despite the heat thanks to the small amount of rain. The lawn flourishes.
But not the garden. The purchased fig tree has dropped all of its leaves and appears dead. The zinnias are crispy brown. The basil still stands a whole 2 inches tall. The Gaia has closed up its leaves and ceased to bloom. The tomatoes have blossoms still, but not a fruit anywhere. Their leaves are curled inward. Just as I go out to water each day, thunder will rumble. The sky will cloud. I'll leave it to Mother Nature to provide the water, but she doesn't provide much. We repeat the process the next day, and the next.
I've given up on the garden. Towards the end of August, I will try again with fall things, but I'm tired of pouring out work and heart into the soil and having no return for my efforts. I'm weary of trying. I'll rest a bit and then we'll start over perhaps.
I've been very happy now for several months. Deeply content. John asked me tonight if I was happy and when I said "Yes," he replied that he worried about my lack of joy. How do you reply to that? I assured him I was happy; told him I had been happier for months now than I've been in ages. He said he didn't feel I was. I assured him again. At that point the conversation turned into a snippy one. His unhappiness perhaps, not mine. Not with our marriage, not with me personally, but with life overall. He worries about aging. He worries about finances. He worries about health. He worries. And when he's worried himself enough, he turns to me asking why I'm not happy. I can't ease his worries or his unhappiness. Would he be more satisfied if I said I was terribly unhappy? Would that make his cares seem less? He's not selfish in that manner but would it soothe him? Or just be one more worry he'd feel the need to carry? I don't know. I sat silent next to him. Gradually we moved into another conversation. Not a fun one, not one I particularly wanted to carry on, but it wasn't as volatile as the subject of my happiness apparently proved to be, so there was that.
The cicadas sang their rhythmic song. The cat came along and purred loudly, delighted to find us outdoors. The dog lay on the grass near the porch, seeking a little more coolness. Peace returned to us both. We sat silently and let the evening wind down. And gradually our conversation wound down.
Saturday: Not much to report about today. We lolled about. John watched copious mini sermons which he played with the volume on so I could hear them too. I worked on genealogy, finally going back to work on my disappointing family line.
I'm not sure how it transpired but at one point seven of my great, great grandmother's sons and daughters and a cousin were in jail. They none of them were hanged or served life as original sentencing stood for three of them and a cousin. But the family was deeply affected by it all the same. Divorces took place. The family continued to be close knit and resided together or in the same neighborhoods. Two of the girls did marry but neither marriage appears to have lasted long. Between the seven there were only three grandchildren. My great-grandfather, her son, was the only one who was not jailed or involved. He lived in another state at the time. Only he went on to have a large and healthy family and a long-lasting marriage.
In contrast, the great, great grandmother's family line was filled to the brim with American patriots...I wonder how she truly felt about her children's refusal to serve.
I put a whole, still partially frozen, young hen into the slow cooker this morning. I set it out to thaw last night but it didn't. I put a ring of crumpled foil in the bottom of the cooker, then put the chicken breast side down and let it slow cook all day long. Yesterday evening, I lifted it out and set it breast side up in a baking dish and then put it in the oven for half an hour to crisp and brown the skin. It turned out just lovely! I have a lot of chicken to plan into meals this next week. The hard part is determining what all I shall make.
It rained today. It started to rain about lunchtime, and it kept it up all afternoon and into the evening, just a slow steady rain that wasn't pounding or flash flooding the area. It feels positively unseasonal, but it is much appreciated.
Sunday: Long morning at church with a planned business meeting after our service. We missed out going to see Taylor because we didn't get out of the building until after 2pm. Taylor has to leave Kate's about 2:30. I was starving. I told John to let Katie know we were just going to head straight home.
It has continued to rain off and on, sometimes hard, but mostly lots of drizzling. The temperature has gone right down into the low 70's, too. It feels positively autumnal. The week ahead is meant to look pretty much the same. Makes me wish I had a turkey breast. I'd treat John to his August Turkey and dressing dinner this week!
I'm going to plan menus for the week ahead. I haven't properly planned meals in a few months now. I'm rather liking my 'new' way which isn't new it's a method I've used at the times in the past. I plan Monday - Wednesday after I check my fridge to see what we have that needs to be used. Then I plan Thursday and Friday. On Saturday or Sunday, I will usually wing meals using whatever I have ready prepared in the freezer or occasionally we'll get takeout. That has worked pretty well for us and I'm not running into the issue of having so very many leftovers backed up in the fridge.
Here's what I'm planning for Monday through Wednesday of this week:
Chicken Pot Pie, Coleslaw, Cranberry sauce.
Kielbasa, Potatoes and Green Beans, Fried Green Tomatoes.
Pork Chops, Squash and Onions, Corn on the Cob, and whatever leftovers of vegetables we have such as slaw, tomatoes, beans, etc.
Plans for the week ahead:
Pick up milk and some more cereal while it's on sale. I'll freeze the milk. The cereal has a use by date of next June or July.
Visit Mama.
Process the peaches I bought last week with the kids. Someone on one blog mentioned Peach Struesel muffins which sounds lovely. I want to make a Peach Cobbler. Any left will be flash frozen and put in the freezer.
I'll make some more Chicken Taquitos at John's request. It was so simple and totally delicious: cream cheese, salsa, chicken mixed and rolled up in flour tortillas then bake until crispy outside. I make them up, then freeze before baking.
If I have more chicken, I may make an extra pot pie to go into the freezer because that's all I can think of I'd like to use it for.
I'll freeze the frame and skin to make broth later.
Begin my old routine housekeeping plan. I'll start by focusing on the living area this week.
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