Diary of a Homemaker's Week: Make the Best of It.

Saturday:  Our car battery was dead this morning.  Not the way we planned to start our day, for sure.  I don't know just why it had to be tested three or four more times because the moment it clicked the first time, the man of the house said, "Oh...That's dead."  But yeah, it had to be tested a few more times, just in case it was fooling.

I got out of the car and started weeding the herb planter.  This is the three-tier planter box that John bought me a few years ago for our anniversary.   I plan to move it around to the patio this spring and plant it out with fresh herbs.  The chives are scant but holding, two tiny sprigs of oregano trying hard to grow, but the lemon thyme, lavender and anything else that was in there are absolutely done.  That's not unusual when we have a truly cold winter as we did this year. 

I would like to grow sage, more lavender, parsley (which is a cool weather crop here as is cilantro).  I wouldn't mind more oregano, as I never get enough each summer to last us through a month, much less a year.  And Basil. I want basil.  My basil did NOTHING last year.  It grew about six inches tall, never got any taller, never bushed out and never flowered.  

After a few sharp words, which I knew to be vented frustration, took a decidedly nasty turn over a comment that put a spoiler on the day.  Mind you, apologies were made after the heat of anger burnt out but doggone it!  It is not a great start to any day and especially not a supposed date to have a flat battery and harsh words.   

We ran into town to the local auto parts/hardware store and got a battery.  Ouch.  That was an expensive start to what was meant to be a supply shopping trip, lol.  We had the money in our car maintenance fund but still, it does put a damper on the 'I want..." bug that is buzzing about your head as you're thinking of shopping and then you start the day with a $200 expense.

Back home again, where John had to put the battery in the car.  Remembering the earlier altercation, I exited and went over to the Sweet Gum tree to start weeding that area.  I got in about a good 10 minutes or more of work which netted me a neat little space.  This is tedious but not difficult.  The area has been well mulched over the years, but one must pull up hundreds of privet and cedar seedlings in the space courtesy the seeds that speed on the breeze/winds and drop as they hit the house at that end.

When all was well, the car tested to insure it was going to start, I headed back to the carport to get in.  It's just as well, as the day was warming fast, and I'd almost gotten to the point of breaking a sweat.  And so we left the house, me with dirty hands and glistening mightily, John sweaty and aggravated and grumpy over the fact that he blamed himself for the battery being dead in the first place.  Never mind that the silly battery was 'only' six years old already and we knew we were going to be replacing it.  The culprit of course, was his fault, which made him madder than if someone else might have been to blame.  He'd switched it off, after Caleb played with it getting in the car earlier in the week.  Unbeknownst to him, while the light went out, it didn't click fully into the 'off' position.  So the light was still on even though the lightbulb had gone out.

We went on to Walmart to do our shopping list.  It wasn't a large list and it got smaller as we discovered we couldn't get all that was on it, even items that the website assured us were in stock were not.  Not a big deal for us.  Remember we were feeling a bit less like spending by the time we arrived, lol.  

What surprised us at the store today was the lack of crowds.  We easily found a parking space at this Walmart on a Saturday, even though we've been loads of times prior and the parking lot was so full that you circled like a vulture for a half hour or so just to get one of the parking spaces that was a great distance from the store.  Then we ran by Publix to pick up Fried Chicken, (None to be had, but I placed an order).  That parking lot too barely had anyone in it. I looked at John and asked, "What's up?  Does everyone but us know of something far more fun to do today than spend a Saturday shopping?"  It was a repeat at the restaurant we went to.  Normally we'd have to go to the rear parking lot, especially on a Saturday but not today.  We parked within feet of the door and only did that because the whole of the parking lot was empty.

Home again home again. We had a very quiet afternoon.  Katie and Caleb seemed especially tired.  Katie had a bad headache.  Caleb, we don't know.  He just went and laid down in the bed and while he didn't go to sleep he was very quiet.  Taylor yawned and stretched and stretched and yawned.  John and I just enjoyed the quiet.

We ended the day with a supper of waffles which I'd made earlier and put into the freezer.  

Sunday:  Up early for church.  John's been making a habit of bringing me a cup of piping hot coffee so when I step out of the shower, I have a cup waiting.  Then he stays in the room and we have coffee together while I put on makeup and change into church clothes.  We come out to have breakfast together.

Today we came home with fried chicken and watermelon.   I'd had to leave an order for the chicken yesterday as they were out and in the middle of a huge order.  It's early for watermelon but someone in Florida must have them as we're seeing them at roadside markets already.  Ours was okay.  Not the sweetest nor the greenest we've eaten.

Katie said Caleb had a hard morning. He cried and whined over everything.  He refused to eat (three days running now he's eaten one small meal and nothing more) but he has no fever and he seems to be functioning just fine.  He'd refused to go potty for her at all. I took him by the hand and led him to the bathroom with protests.  Not because Katie couldn't do the same, but the past two weeks he's insisted that ONLY Gramma could change his pants or help him with the potty and I figured it was just more of that fuss.  We had a successful try.

They had to leave early to meet Taylor's daddy who was camping at a lake within a half hour or so of our home.  It saved Katie driving 2 hours today which was thoughtful of him.  I've picked up the house, put on a load of dishes to wash, put away the foodstuffs and am trying to rest for a bit before we head out to tonight's senior supper.

Monday:  If yesterday's entry seems to end abruptly, it did.  I took a nap.  I must have closed my eyes to rest them for a moment and about thirty minutes later I woke.   I did feel refreshed, and I hadn't overslept as I feared I might if I'd laid down on the bed.

We went to senior supper last night.  We've sat with all kinds of people in the past two years, but rarely do we have the same company twice.  Generally, if we approach someone, we discover they are 'holding' a seat for others to join their table.  It's made us a bit blue to be honest.  John said last night on the way, "Just find a table that is completely empty, and we'll just eat by ourselves tonight!  I'm tired of us running people off."   

Later a fellow small group member and her sister with whom we're acquainted came by and asked if they might sit with us.  We said, "Certainly."  They were still in the serving line when Pastor Al came by and said, "Why are two sitting alone?"  John replied, "Well, no one ever wants to keep us company..." and I made a quick light statement, "We have no idea why Pastor Al, we've changed deodorants and everything..." which made him laugh.  Then I told him that our friend Sandra and her sister was with us and he said, "Well that's okay then.  I don't like to see people sitting all alone."  I can't say that John and I much like being left alone either, but we've yet to find that couple we 'click' with even after two years.

No one is ugly or snubs us hard.   The people we've sat with or have been in other group situations with always smile and say hello and call us by name.  They are friendly. It's just that they know one another and don't know us.  They live in the same area, worked together, have gone to church together for years or live in the same neighborhood.  We live out of town.  And we've only been going full time to church for the past two years. 

Anyway, we've put it to prayer that God will bring us a couple with whom we might be friendly.

On the way out of the building last night we were greeted with the most beautiful sunset.  The sky was pink and orange stripes with deep violet clouds moving eastward and deep red low on the horizon.  It was stunning all the way home.  

I slept like a LOG last night and well into the morning.  Caleb was especially quiet this morning and I thought perhaps he wasn't yet up, but he heard me moving about in the bedroom and came to the door and said "Gwamma, up?"  "Yes, I am!" and he turned to shout to John 'Gwampa, Gwamma's Wake!"   It's awfully nice of the two of them to allow me to sleep in just a bit later, but they are starving when I get up, usually between 7:45 and 8:15.  So the greeting is usually especially joyful from both, lol.

Caleb was leaning against a cabinet door later, dressed in his ball cap, favorite shirt (snakes and lizards on it), jeans and shoes.  He sort of posed with one hand on his hip and one foot out in front of the other and I said, "Boy do you look cool!"  He corrected me. "Awesome. I AWESOME, Gwamma."  

I had a very productive morning this morning.  While I was getting breakfast things cooked, I started the bread machine.  Until it gets too too hot to contemplate turning on the oven, I just use the machine to make my dough.  I unloaded the dishwasher, a task that Caleb 'helps' with. He's quite good at putting all the dishes on the counters I indicate they should go on, and then he empties the utensil basket.  That is mostly just gather all of one item then dump in the drawer.  The drawer and utensil holder are not quite in his line of vision yet.  I feel it's a huge help just to have him carry those things over to the drawer.  It takes only moments to sort out after.

When we were done with breakfast, I cleared the table and put all the chairs in a line up and told him come get on the train.  I loaded "freight" on the back car/chair, and he had bears and a monkey as passengers on the second chair and he was in the lead chair.  He must have thanked me four times for making him a train.  Which reminds me why I love this age.  They recognize play and embrace imagination it if you only encourage them!

I headed to our room to swipe down the bath, clear the room up and make the bed.  Our room was pretty much a big disaster.  Piles of clothes, piles of papers, bed a mess.  Ugh.  I'm going to try to start putting it in order on Sunday evening so that I don't have such a mess come Monday morning.

While I was putting things neatly away, I pulled all the heavier sweaters from the closet.  It was cool this morning but I'm pretty sure we're past frosty mornings now and really cold weather.  I have vacuum seal storage bags coming and I plan to put all the sweaters in them to store for summer.  I don't know where I'll store them yet, but I'll store them somewhere.  

Once the room was set to rights, I brought the checkbook up to date after our weekend with receipts I'd gathered Saturday and Sunday.  Hmmm...Which reminds me I missed the one for Gramma's fried Chicken.  I'll have to go search my purse and be sure to enter that one in the check register, as well.

Out of the room once more, I sorted out the dirty dishes and then wiped down all the counters.  I put bread in the pan to rise and pulled meats to thaw for the week ahead.  Our small group leader asked if he could interview us for his Master thesis, and we agreed.  He's coming to dinner on Thursday night. I thought I'd roast the chicken for that night and since it's a proper roasting hen, I want to make sure it has plenty of time to thaw.

When bread went in the oven, leftover Taco Pasta went in alongside to warm for our lunch.  Then I took my binder and wrote down probably 30 menus for the warm months ahead to use, and jotted down ideas of variations of the same recipes which probably netted me fifteen more ideas.

After lunch, when Caleb was in quiet time, I set the timer on my phone for thirty minutes and headed outdoors to work.  I managed to weed a tiny flower bed and two pots, found a slip of a tomato plant that I repotted (it has since disappeared.).  It will either grow or die, no loss if it does die, but how nice if it grows.  I picked up all the pile of limbs and several piles of weeds and emptied them in the limb pile.  I worked steadily and hard until I started hearing what I thought was windchimes.  I was dumping limbs  and I looked overhead puzzled, wondering if someone had hung windchimes in the trees.  No silly woman, it's the timer going off on your phone! lol   My hip was twinging pretty hard at that point, so I minded the timer and came indoors.

Now here I sit with a quiet half hour or so ahead of me before Caleb is up.  John has Mens' meeting tonight.  I've planned an easy supper for Katie, Caleb and I.   I think after supper, I'll watch the movie, "Enchanted April,".  I've finished that book last week and can now say that the movie is remarkably close with just a few variations.  

I also read Grace Livingston Hill's April Gold, which is another lovely homemaking sort of story.  I don't know that I'll do a theme every single month for entertainment, but I've enjoyed this little nod to the month of April with themed books and a movie.

Tuesday:  Woke to Caleb crying hard this morning.  I knew he was likely hungry.  He didn't eat lunch yesterday, barely had a snack and ate no supper.  He's been eating very little the past four days. Milk alone can't hold a little fellow for hours.  Why no one else offered him food I couldn't say, but it put my feet under me and got me out of the room as rapidly as I might.  He ate a carton of yogurt (just 5 ounces), 1.5 boiled eggs, and a portion of his muffin.  Then he wanted juice.  I'm glad to see his appetite has returned.

I was going to putter in the kitchen, but I ran out of steam pretty fast.  I had a perfectly awful night, with not nearly enough sleep.   I decided that being kind to me was the best thing I could do for us all.  At one point I tried to sit down with the computer, but Caleb was having none of that.  I set it aside and picked up my phone instead.  It wasn't long before he demanded screen time and I refused.  He looked at me in a way that made me put my phone away.  

I took him outdoors on the back porch.  I swept off the porch then watered the ferns and the Wandering Jew.  Then we fed the cat and dog.

I could tell Caleb really wanted to be outdoors and I really wanted him to be outdoors for a time myself. I said, "Come on, let's go clean off the front porch."  I blew off the front porch and the patio, rolled up hoses, uncovered the spigot out front, pulled some weeds.  Caleb got out his chalk, brought down his slide, brought a few cars from inside.  We stayed outdoors about an hour, I think.  

My goal was to see if I could trust him to stay near me, if he'd return when he started to wander.  Today he did, and it makes me far more willing to try to make this a daily thing with him when the weather is amendable.  We had a nice time.  I told John I hope to gradually allow him to expand his territory as I find he is trustworthy of his freedom.  

John came out to sit on the steps after he'd finished his music practice.  It was really a beautiful morning.  We stayed out until lunchtime.  Perhaps we might even take lunch outdoors one day.  I wonder if Caleb would like that.  

Caleb is changing in so many ways and it's happening so quickly.  The battle to go potty has decreased and he's almost always successful in using it.  I remind him he can use it for all functions, but so far, it's not yet sunk in.  I'm not fretting.  It will eventually happen.  In the meantime, we're leaps and bounds ahead of where we were two months ago.

He's also learning to de-escalate and is better able to communicate.  He's using bigger words each day.  That part reminds me of Josh who was slow to talk and then, though he didn't always use full sentences, he often used bigger words.   This is how Caleb is doing.  He can also read his name.  I wrote it on the patio in chalk this morning but didn't tell him what I was writing.  Then I also drew out basic shapes.  He named all the shapes when John came out, then pointed to his name and said, "That's Caleb." 

I took a very brief ten-minute nap.  I think that's about all I'll get today, so I'm going to go fill up some vacuum seal storage bags with quilts and sweaters.  I'll at least have that job tackled.

later:  One thing leads to another doesn't it?  Caleb was unrelenting in his need for constant in your face attention this afternoon.  I managed to pack up two bags and then had to exit my room and come attend to him.  He's gotten into a habit of saying, "No, I want Gwamma to do it," and darned if everyone doesn't just stand by looking helpless waiting for Gwamma to come do it.

So at 7:45 this evening, I got back to the bags.  Three were vacuum sealed and when I said, "I have no idea where these are going to go." John decided to take matters in hand and hauled things out from under our bed and started shoving in bags.  Never mind the stuff coming out now had to go somewhere...I was not happy.  We quarreled and sniped at one another until I told him I quit.  I went into the bathroom and started taking off my makeup and changing into my nightgown.  I slammed things about a bit in my fit of frustration, though it likely sounded a good deal like my fits of anger.  I am a slammer.  I confess it.  I slam doors shut and slam them open and slam things down on surfaces.  I seldom get upset enough to vent myself in this way but when I do...UGH.

John decided that retreat from the bedroom was the best way to end it and I admit it helped tremendously to have him gone.  I came out and sat in front of the fan to cool off, took off nail polish and contemplated my life/stuff.  All this stuff.  

I realize we don't have enough closets.  We've never had enough, only three, in this house and once the children left, John quickly filled one with his things and I took one to use as a pantry, which leaves only the master closet.  He'd long ago bought me my own shed to store all the things I wanted to keep, like Christmas trees and an old oak highchair and loads of other things that was no longer being used in the house or was shoved in the closet he took over in the back bedroom.  I imagined walking out to that shed and looking through it all and I realized that a lot of it is stuff I kept because I was making do, couldn't afford better, and once I'd acquired those things, I didn't want to let go of them entirely because I might need/want them again someday.

I also have acquired things that others don't want to let go of. I know there are things of Katie's in that shed.  There's a washing machine that I don't know why we kept when we bought the new one.  It works.  And so that 'working' machine has been sitting there for two years.  I didn't want to keep it, but there it is.  There's at least one big bin of things that John can't let go of but won't store in his own closet.  

And that's just what's outdoors in the shed.  What about here in the house?  Right now, if I had half the energy and ambition I had pre-Gramma daycare, I'd empty the whole blamed house and bring in things one at a time only after I was dead sure I wanted them in here.  And honestly, it's a good thing I'm drained because I was just about frustrated enough to start doing just that very thing!

The truth is, and I recognize this, I hate hate hate having things stored under things and shoved into every spare inch of a closet.  I grew up in a house like that and it drove me nuts then, and it drives me nuts now.

I'm not a minimalist, I'm very much not a minimalist, but I NEED those white spaces, those empty spaces in order to feel...less anxious, for one thing, and less burdened by things.   And right now I don't have that.  

Again, I have to point out that it's not Katie's stuff that is crowding me out.  It's all mine.  Katie has only her bedding, clothes and Caleb's little bed here.  Well aside from the two boxes in the shed.  No, it's stuff that I myself have accumulated and accumulated and accumulated.  

I think it's time I started letting go of my stuff.  I need to go through this process and assess what I have and ask myself why I have it.  I'm going to go to work in our room tomorrow, our closet, my dresser.   I need the free space to feel peaceful and that is the ultimate goal.

Wednesday:  

I am tired and snappy.  I didn't wake tired, nor snappy, but Caleb was very much in the mood to shout "No!" to everything including the very things he wanted this morning and then he started going around in a storm of tears about everything.  Finally, he said, "I'm tired!  I wanna lie down.  I want Blippie!"  There's one wish Gramma was all too ready to fulfill and did.  He was given the opportunity to have an early lunch, which he declined after eating two crackers, and then he was put to bed with his tv time.  I'll be letting him out here in about 10 minutes.  I hope he's feeling better.

He too started his day in a fine mood.  He called to me this morning, "Wake, Gwamma?" and when I said I was coming out in a moment, that I was getting dressed, he said "Pockets.  Hat."  That meant he had on his clothes, too.  Pockets on pants are life, right now.  And a hat.

At one point earlier in the morning, I had put Caleb in his room to calm down because he was so distraught over my suggestion that he might like to play with his cars...Seriously.  It was then I went to my room and shut the door, too. I started clearing out drawers, closets, trunks.  It was a HUGE mess.  

John got out of the room mighty quick and let Caleb out of his room.  I came out after I was overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I had pulled out.  Honestly, I had boxes of things I'd filled and shoved in the closet and no clue why I put them there.  I do know how to organize things.  You put similar items together.  The most used items go into the most accessible places.  Least used go into other less accessible places.  Then why were some of these things in the places they were?!  

After Caleb went into his room for quiet time, I went back to work.  I had 90 minutes to work on it at that point, because I'd just put a poundcake in the oven to bake.  I was still overwhelmed with it all, but I have done what I could.  

My room is still a huge mess, BUT I have emptied and sorted and been rather ruthless in said sorting.  I admitted that some things are never going to be used by me though I've saved and saved them.  I have a huge black trash bag of donations, two empty spots on my closet shelves, an empty bin, and culled enough of my vintage magazines to allow me more than ample room to store all of my sweaters, gloves and winter scarves.   

Yes, the vintage magazines were/are stored in my m in the bottom drawer of my old lady dresser.  They are there because little fingers kept opening the closed section of bookshelf where I had them and picking them to bits.  Ideally, they'd be stored on a bookshelf, but I am out of bookcase space.  I desperately need another one. 

At any rate, I have done a massive lot of work today.  

later:  Caleb wanted to go outside this afternoon and so John and I went out with him.  I showed him the parameters of where he could play, and he did pretty well about staying within that wide boundary.  It was gorgeous outdoors, but almost a little too warm.  Thankfully we were able to sit in the shade.  

I can't say I was less tired, but it's nice to get a break from the usual.  I put my hands in the dirt while I was out there and listened to birds and bees.  It was lovely.

 Do you know that all day long today I wore ONE earring?  Every morning, part of my getting dressed is to put on my earrings.  I only put on one this morning, got interrupted and didn't put on the second one.  I noticed it.  I noticed it five or six times.  And each time, a distraction arose, and I forgot to go get my other earring.  So, there I was at 9pm last night standing before the mirror about to remove my makeup and I was still wearing just one earring.  Some days, lol...

Thursday:  Another poor night's sleep.  I was nice to me this afternoon and when Caleb went down for a nap, I lay down too.  I didn't go to sleep, but I did become aware after about 15 minutes of resting that I felt a lot better.   That was an important break for me today.  And a good reminder to take advantage of lying down for just a few minutes when I've had a long morning's work.

Before I lay down though, as soon as Caleb was in his room for quiet time, I had John back the car up to the back porch and I loaded ALL the stuff I'd culled from my room into the car and then drove it around to the shed where I unloaded it.  I knew I wasn't up to five or six trips across the yard and back again lugging heavy or awkward objects to the shed.  I don't consider this a waste of gas in the least!  I consider it working smarter.  It took a whole lot less time and energy and meant I could go lie down that much sooner.

I was busy all morning long.  Part of it was getting ready for our company dinner tonight doing food prep.  Part was simply puttering around cleaning up.  This afternoon, I need to wash a few dishes and fill the salt and pepper shakers for the table.  

I've promised Caleb outdoor time again this afternoon.  While out there, I plan to play in the dirt a little bit more.  I'm going to set out the coleus I've rooted and kept over winter and divide the hibiscus into three other pots so I can spread that color around.  But mostly I'm going to sit and watch Caleb play.  I like watching him play and watching for things to point out to him like birds, bees, butterflies, frogs.  I'm taking his water table out on the patio this afternoon and putting water in it so he can splash in that.  

Then we'll head indoors so I can finish up supper, put on some makeup and change my clothes.

My meal for company is from my menu plan, with side dishes adjusted:  

Roasted Chicken, Roasted Asparagus with Lemon Butter, Rice Pilaf, Fresh homemade bread, Banana Poundcake.  I'm debating whether I want to add that grape/yogurt salad to the menu.  Heaven knows I have grapes enough to make it.  Fortunately, it doesn't take too much time to make.

I opted NOT to make the grape salad.  That will make a nice side dish this weekend perhaps.  

Caleb's water table went outdoors, and we let him play in water today since it was so warm.  He was absolutely over the moon about it and kept saying "I'm wet!"  He was, too.  When we came indoors, he wanted to take a bath.  I didn't see any point.  He was so wet, the purpose of the bath would have been pointless.

Friday:  Our guest departed at about 10:15pm last night.  He interviewed us separately after supper.  It was really an interesting interview.  

Supper was delicious, and I was super glad I'd chosen the menu I did because our guest was nearly an hour late.  He'd gotten started early enough but forgot his questions and had to go back home.  His home is a good 45 minutes or so from our home.   This worked out well, because Caleb ate a bit earlier and was already sound asleep.

Katie was a tremendous help in getting food plated and served and the table cleared.  The one thing she didn't do was load the dishwasher.  No one in my family loads the dishwasher except me.  John will handwash every thing rather than open the dishwasher.  Katie would load it if she were here alone for any length of time, and run it, too, but she respects my right to load my dishwasher in my own way.

Have you ever noticed that most people have their own individual ways of loading?    I have.  Mama used to come behind me and tell me how to load hers back when I was cleaning her home.  When Katie was out those evenings back in the fall, she left loading to me, but on weekends while she was home, she did it her way.  I know that in the household across the field, Sam usually loads the dishwasher.  

I had another night of absolute rot for sleep.  Why?  No full moon.  No sugary drink or dessert of any sort.  Not a high carb meal.  I would doze and then feel myself gasp awake.  As the hours ticked back, I found myself with pain in my body.  In thinking hard, which is the last thing I ought to have been doing, I could relate the onset of this bout of sleeplessness to the fact that I screwed up my medications when I filled my pill box.  One over the counter drug and one prescription drug were left off for nearly a week.  

Now generally I am all for an occasional break from a routine medication line up, but I can say sincerely that both these medicines are absolutely necessary to my body.  You can be sure that I made double certain I set my pill boxes up correctly today!

Typical Friday work, but frankly I am too weary to even think of cleaning bathrooms.  We've a late night ahead again tonight.  I hope to take Caleb outdoors again this afternoon but at 4pm, we all begin the process of getting ready to leave the house.  We'll meet Katie at the church and swap Caleb off to her.  We won't likely be home until 10ish tonight.  

I'd worked hard to get John to show enthusiasm, even lukewarm, for any number of weekend getaway ideas.  His suggestions involved long travel, one of the things I wanted to avoid.  Then he elicited comments from others at our table Sunday evening and those too involved long distance (over four hours one way) of travel.  That just seems excessive to me for what can at best be a one-night getaway.  I was more interested in doing something within an hour or so of home.  You know, so I can sleep in, check out at 10:30 and know I've got a little free time before I have to head home.  

Now, I really need to shut my eyes for a few minutes.  I hope you all have a lovely weekend.  Mine will involve dropping off a ton of stuff at Goodwill and probably running into Kroger to pick up sale priced milk and the free items I have coupons for.  Big whoop, right?

What do you have planned?  And how was your week?