May 7: Use What You Have

 

I slept quite late this morning and there was little point in making breakfast once I'd had my coffee.  I had a hard time shutting down my brain last night and when I finally did, I apparently snored my head off and woke with a very sore throat.  John confirmed my suspicion that I was snoring when he greeted me this morning.  "You were cutting the z's last night!"  I pointed out that I had been cutting them this morning, as my throat assured me it was true.  

I was undetermined about what I might do today. Part of mental gymnastics last night was planning all the things I could do if I felt so inclined.  Wander around the grocery picking up sundry things which led to making mental grocery lists.  Or I could go to the garden center and buy flowering plants and soil, go proper shopping where shoes are sold, call up one of the kids to have lunch with me, work about the outdoors of the house, go to visit Mama...The list of possibilities went on and on.   

But with a poor night's sleep behind me, a slightly sore throat, rainy morning, and a quick check-up on the checkbook totals (matched against the bank), I put all such plans behind me.  I stayed home.  John is off having lunch with his best friend and former partner.  I had the possibility of three or four or so hours on my own right here at home and I found the prospect was pleasant.  So here I am, at home.

Honestly for a week now I've been a little unsettled.  I want things I cannot acquire at the moment.  No need to say to me that I've just had the kitchen freshly painted, and a few other blessings besides.  Why then do I find myself longing for things I haven't got?  If I'm making a meal, I want anything in the world except what is on hand.  In the yard, I've a few blooms, I've planted a load of seeds, some of which did appear and many which did not, but I'm longing to go buy a world of annuals and blooms to fill the baskets and pots that are empty.  The closet is full of clothes, but I haven't a thing to wear.  I have all sorts of pretty things to decorate with, but I only want to use the things that require a new frame or shade or paint.

Last night I lay in bed thinking about all of this and I decided that was enough.  I'll change what I can using what I have.  And so that helped to set the pace of today.  What could I do with what I already had?  Well, I definitely have a mop and vacuum and broom, rags to clean with and cleaning is always a good place to start any project.  So that is where I began today.  

I decided I would clean the floors. I had put off mopping while the work was ongoing.  There were bits of sawdust and clumps of dirt on the floors from the work yesterday.  Travis is very careful not to mess things up and to try and clean up behind himself, but dust just settles in hard to get to places unless you're using a vacuum.  Sam had walked across the floor and left the dirt behind.  He got that on his shoes when he walked across the field to Granny's and got the cast iron pans and then took branches from the fig tree that he's asked me to root.  

By the way, part of what I did in my wakeful state last night along about 2am was pick up my phone and watch a video on how to propagate fig trees...

I took everything from the kitchen floor and mopped it really well, then I stopped and made lunch for myself (a chicken Ranch salad).  I actually got chilly sitting here having my lunch, so I decided it would be a good time to go outdoors and work on getting those fig cuttings into dirt.  Then I brought in the cast-iron pans and started cleaning those up.  I did a few minor garden tasks outdoors before I came in to clean the pans.  John had come home while I was on the porch working on trimming down the fig branches into cuttings.  

I felt happy with what I'd accomplished today indoors and out.  I put 20 cuttings into soil, and we'll see how they do.  John's not been the happiest this afternoon.  No clue why he's upset but asking has only irritated him further, so I'll leave him to sort it out on his own.  Perhaps he's feeling as I am, wanting everything but what he has at hand at the moment.  We all get that way, man and woman and child.  

But we shall just get over it and do what we can!

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