I Wander as I Wonder: Random Musings


Sometimes these posts have a common theme...sometimes they are just what I say they are, Random Musings with no real connection other than they were all in my mind in a given set of hours.  I never know myself how these posts will turn out but I enjoy the free flow thinking that goes into them.  I hope you do, too.

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Spring.  I think I've absorbed spring this year.  I mean that it seems I can't get enough of the blue, so blue!,  skies, the wonder of pale green leaves in fifty shades of green (and wouldn't that make a lovely book?), blooms and scents and just the glory of it all.  I was out early this morning picking up the last of the weeds and began weeding about a clump of iris that barely bloomed...but only they know why not because they have the loveliest healthiest leaves I've seen in many years.  Weeding is not a hard task when the dew is wet upon the grass, a mockingbird insists upon serenading me with his full repertoire of bird calls (Bob White, Pretty pretty and a dozen other calls), and a fluffy red dog is wagging her tail next to me.  I feel tender towards the teeny tiny basil plants that are finally coming up.  I smile at the dahlias that are pushing their way to the surface.  I anxiously look for the first signs of the lily of the valley and the bleeding heart though I did just plant them a week ago.  Lovely.  It's all so very lovely, isn't it?


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I've had one of those days. Not one of those days where everything goes absolutely wrong.  Not a 'might as well' sort of day where you keep going deeper and deeper into tasks about the house because while you do this you 'might as well go on and do" that.  No, it was one of those steady sort of days, where little jobs came to mind and so I went right ahead and did them and it progressed along all day long that way until I finally sat down this evening to truly rest. It was a full day and time flew as I worked but I never worked hard enough to get deeply tired and so many little tasks are done, little things I might not think to do again anytime soon.  It is, I suppose, a tying up loose ends sort of housekeeping day and that is especially nice because it means that so many things are DONE.

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Amie sent me an early Mother's Day present and I was very pleased.  She knitted me a lovely blanket in a variegated teal yarn that is so soft.  It came in a pretty handmade tote.  The blanket has been a work in progress for some time.  I tossed it over the back of my chair.  I often wish for something to keep me just a little warmer and dislike having to be heavily clothed.

She also sent me a card and the envelope was filled with photos of the school aged children.  Money hasn't always been available for her to buy the school pictures in the past and I understand that too well as we struggled with those times as well.

But it was the note inside the card, in which her mother heart spoke to my mother heart and she said how much her respect and love for me has grown over the years as she's parented her own children.  That brought tears to my eyes.

I said earlier this month, it's funny how much we come to value the very good opinion of our children, especially our daughters.

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I looked out the kitchen window this morning and noted that a 'suddenly' moment had occurred.  It happens all of the time in the natural world, no matter how closely you've watched.   I looked out and saw the long, full shadow of the Sweet Gum tree across the front lawn.  A day or two ago the leaves were still delicate and yellow green and the limbs stood out plainly against the sky.  Not so this morning.  Suddenly the tree is fully leafed and the shadow filled the space on the lawn.

I went to the other windows in the room and looked out at the trees and realized we were, once more, fully closed in with a wall of green surrounding us on three sides.  No more glimpsing the rooftop of this house or the peach orchard across the way. 

John and I sat on the porch this morning and listened to the southern wind blowing the leaves, a very fluid sort of sound.  "It sounds like surf", he said.  I've often thought it sounded like running water myself.

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One more week of April...Just one week.  It boggles the mind...

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We went into our lovely small town today which was jam packed for the local Festival.  Ours is called The Strawberry Festival and local strawberries were for sale.  There was a really good turnout this year and craft tents and food tents and vendors of all sorts.  There were contests: mower races, weiner dog races, firetruck pulls.  The local authorities were in good showing from police to sheriff deputies, paramedics and firemen.   There were faces we knew and so we stopped to speak. 

There was music playing and dogs barking and children screeching and the air was filled with the aroma of cooking foodstuffs, a sweet smoky aroma that drifted here and there.

And most of all, there was the book sale.  Yes, I went to the book sale and my purchases totaled two dollars.  Between us, John and I brought home less than 12 books, which is pretty good considering I must have donated 50 or so.  And yes, I managed to avoid those I'd donated, several of which I saw in the boxes...And I bought a birdhouse.  A pretty cottagey blank slate handmade bird house.  Perfect for my summer front porch.

The weather was absolutely divine.  Warm and sunny with a steadily blowing cool breeze.  If it had been specially ordered, it couldn't have been more perfect.  

Today I was enamored of our little nothing town all over again...

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We are going to take a trip here soon.  We've been in prayer about it for some time but it's only been recently that we could actually plan and set into motion the details.  John prayed over that again at Passover last night.  His prayer moved my heart.

Because this man, who has been a partner and husband and friend and lover to me for 24 years, who has alone time galore with me, prayed that God would allow us to draw closer, to catch up with each other once more.

Only a man who is truly aware of how distracting even a peaceful normal life can be at times, how involving personal pursuits and chores and earning a wage can be and how just plain living can be a solitary thing knows that these are not the 'we' moments.  Because even after all this time, this man I married is willing to continually work at our marriage and constantly checks in, instead of just being satisfied with the day to day.

He's pretty special, this guy.

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Whenever we plan a trip there's a part of me that wants to take a vacation from the daily stuff.  No dishes, no making bed, no preparing the meals.  The trouble is that I like to have clean dishes to eat off, the bed isn't comfortable to me if not properly put back together and I get hungry.  It's not a matter of budget where food is concerned, though that comes in as well.  No, it's the fact that I want real food, my food, not food cooked to other's tastes.  Certainly not mass produced fast food.  I want food that tastes authentic and yummy and that nourishes.  So I cook and I go planning to cook.

I'm fortunate that on vacation John will prepare every other meal and do every other dishwashing.  He'll even help make the bed (something he does as often at home by the way).  It's a small break from routine things and daily meal plans and that is a help, isn't it? 

And in between those few moments of normal living, there will be lots and lots of time to talk deeply and to laugh and to sit quietly and be contemplative before we start all over again.

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5 comments:

Louise said...

Ah it is times while reading your posts that I really miss my hubby. He has been gone now for almost 24 years. However I have no desire to replace him. My memories shall suffice.

Karla Neese said...

I love hearing about your marriage as it so reminds me of my own with my dear Brad. He has a saying that marriage can be hell on earth or it can be heaven on earth and it's our choice which we make it. I love that every year for the past 24 years (coming up on Monday, May 9) it has gotten better and better, we've gone deeper and deeper and to this day we are still madly in love.

Congrats on the hard work and the joyful rewards, my friend!

Lana said...

Crazy in love with my sweet man for 38 years. He is so like your John. I could hardly breathe for the 15 days he was in France.

Anonymous said...

Yes you are right John seems like a very special man indeed. I bet he compliments you to others too. It is easy to take each other for granted and trying not to is special. Working on getting to really deep down know each other is awesome. Sometimes a little thing here and another there unresolved can become a little knot in our relationships. To stop and take the time to rewind and grow closer again...yes you two definitely have something very special. We are closing in on 47 years and I too am glad for the man God gave me. Sarah

Anonymous said...

By the way...I like you new backdrop print!! :-) Sarah

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